The words of one of my favorite songs starts like this, “Make me broken so I can be healed…..” That’s exactly where I was about two (2) years ago. I was broken. The song’s lyrics say, “Make me empty so I can be filled….” I was just about as empty as I could have ever imagined; empty in my eyes, maybe not in God’s, but in my own I was beyond empty. The chorus of the song is powerful to me….. “Til You are my one desire. Til You are my one true love. Til You are my breath, my everything. Lord, please keep making me….” It’s seemingly taken me forever to realize that God is my one true love! That He has never given up on me and that He constantly and consistently is my one true desire!
A few days ago (Friday 8/29) I was struggling. I was having a bad day, I was over whelmed, and I just felt alone. That’s when it happened; that’s when God showed up…… A few months back, when my mom was in the hospital for her first surgery with the colon cancer I experienced something powerful. Every day, for 25 straight days, I heard that song. It was usually as I pulled into the parking garage at the hospital. After about 5 days in a row I began to wonder if it was just a coincidence, or was God maybe there in the car with me. I drove different cars, took different routes, I even tested God and turned the radio off, but still the song was there. It would bring me to tears and I would feel every word as if God was speaking each individual word to me. On day 25 I got nervous…… I was parking the car and no song. Just as I went to turn the ignition off it started playing. Teary eyed I prayed and told myself I would never listen to the radio again on the way down there. Day 26 never happened, my mom came home. Today I came full circle with that song…..
After leaving my office (Friday 8/29) I got in my car and ran some errands and just as I normally would I turned the radio on. Just as the sound came on, the song came on. I was in tears to the point that as I sat in traffic, at a red light, I was too consumed with my tears to notice the car to my right. We were side by side….. A mother driving one of those fancy SUV’s, with a three, maybe four year old little boy in the back seat. He was sitting behind her seat….. Not sure why, I always liked me kids on the opposite side, but whatever, my OCD isn’t part of the story! The kid and I locked eyes and as we did he began to cry, I could visibly see his tears. He saw mine and when he did he put his hand on the window, almost like he was wanting to hold my hand. I stretched over to my passengers window and spread my palm onto the window just like his. We literally sobbed together in that moment and I felt God’s presence warm over me. It may have only been for as short as 30 seconds or less, but I felt it. The image of that little boy is forever etched into my heart.
I had my blog written already, just waiting for today to get here…… It’s been almost two (2) years since my baptism and that’s what I wanted to share. God stepped in…… To that little boy, whereever he is, thanks kid you absolutely made my day!
Here’s my song…….